Vespasian (Suetonius)

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	Vespasian Author: Suetonius	Translator: Alexander Thomson
13	Amicorum libertatem , causidicorum figuras ac philosophorum contumaciam lenissime tulit . Licinium Mucianum notae impudicitiae , sed meritorum fiducia minus sui reuerentem , numquam nisi clam et hactenus retaxare sustinuit , ut apud communem aliquem amicum querens adderet clausulam : ' ego tamen uir sum .' Saluium Liberalem in defensione diuitis rei ausum dicere : ' quid ad Caesarem , si Hipparchus sestertium milies habet ?' et ipse laudauit . Demetrium Cynicum in itinere obuium sibi post damnationem ac neque assurgere neque salutare se dignantem , oblatrantem etiam nescio quid , satis habuit canem appellare .	He bore with great mildness the freedom used by his friends, the satirical allusions of advocates, and the petulance of philosophers. Licinius Mucianus, who had been guilty of notorious acts of lewdness, but, presuming upon his great services, treated him very rudely, he re- proved only in private; and when complaining of his con- duct to a common friend of theirs, he concluded with these words, "However, I am a man." Salvius Liberalis, in pleading the. cause of a rich man under prosecution, presuming to say, "What is it to Caesar, if Hipparchus possesses a hundred millions of sesterces?" he com- mended him for it. Demetrius, the Cynic philosopher, who had been sentenced to banishment, meeting him on the road, and refusing to rise up or salute him, nay, snarling at him in scurrilous language, he only called him a cur.
14	Offensarum inimicitiarumque minime memor executorue Vitelli hostis sui filiam splendidissime maritauit , dotauit etiam et instruxit . trepidum eum interdicta aula sub Nerone quaerentemque , quidnam ageret aut quo abiret , quidam ex officio admissionis simul expellens abire Morbouiam iusserat . in hunc postea deprecantem non ultra uerba excanduit , et quidem totidem fere atque eadem . nam ut suspicione aliqua uel metu ad perniciem cuiusquam compelleretur tantum afuit , ut monentibus amicis cauendum esse Mettium Pompusianum , quod uolgo crederetur genesim habere imperatoriam , insuper consulem fecerit , spondens quandoque beneficii memorem futurum .	He was little disposed to keep up the memory of affronts or quarrels, nor did he harbour any resentment on account of them. He made a very splendid marriage for the daughter of his enemy Vitellius, and gave her, besides, a suitable fortune and equipage. Being in a great consternation after he was forbidden the court in the time of Nero, and asking those about him, what he should do? or, whither he should g ? one of those whose office it was to introduce people to the emperor, thrusting him out, bid him go to Morbonia. But when this same person came afterwards to beg his pardon, he only vented his resentment in nearly the same words. He was so far from being influenced by suspicion or fear to seek the destruction of any one, that, when his friends advised him to beware of Metius Pomposianus, because it was commonly believed, on his nativity being cast, that he was destined by fate to the empire, he made him consul, promising for him, that he would not forget the benefit conferred.
15	Non temere quis punitus insons reperietur nisi absente eo et ignaro aut certe inuito atque decepto . Heluidio Prisco , qui et reuersum se ex Syria solus priuato nomine Vespasianum salutauerat et in praetura omnibus edictis sine honore ac mentione ulla transmiserat , non ante succensuit quam altercationibus insolentissimis paene in ordinem redactus . hunc quoque , quamuis relegatum primo , deinde et interfici iussum , magni aestimauit seruare quoquo modo , missis qui percussores reuocarent ; et seruasset , nisi iam perisse falso renuntiatum esset . ceterum neque caede cuiusquam umquam iustis suppliciis inlacrimauit etiam et ingemuit .	It will scarcely be found, that so much as one innocent person suffered in his reign, unless in his absence, and without his knowledge, or, at least, contrary to his inclination, and when he was imposed upon. Although Helvidius Priscus was the only man who presumed to salute him on his return from Syria by his private name of Vespasian, and, when he came to be praetor, omitted any mark of honour to him, or even any mention of him in his edicts, yet he was not angry, until Helvidius proceeded to inveigh against him with the most scurrilous language. Though he did indeed banish him, and afterwards ordered him to be put to death, yet he would gladly have saved him notwithstanding, and accordingly dispatched messengers to fetch back the executioners; and he would have saved him, had he not been deceived by a false account brought, that he had already perished. He never ejroiced at the death of any man; nay, he would shed tears, and sigh, atthe just punishment of the guilty.
16	Sola est , in qua merito culpetur , pecuniae cupiditas . non enim contentus omissa sub Galba uectigalia reuocasse , noua et grauia addidisse , auxisse tributa prouinciis , nonnullis et duplicasse , negotiationes quoque uel priuato pudendas propalam exercuit , coemendo quaedam tantum ut pluris postea distraheret . ne candidatis quidem honores reisue tam innoxiis quam nocentibus absolutiones uenditare cunctatus est . creditur etiam procuratorum rapacissimum quemque ad ampliora officia ex industria solitus promouere , quo locupletiores mox condemnaret ; quibus quidem uolgo pro spongiis dicebatur uti , quod quasi et siccos madefaceret et exprimeret umentis . Quidam natura cupidissimum tradunt , idque exprobratum ei a sene bubulco , qui negata sibi gratuita libertate , quam imperium adeptum suppliciter orabat , proclamauerit , uulpem pilum mutare , non mores . sunt contra qui opinentur ad manubias et rapinas necessitate compulsum summa aerarii fiscique inopia , de qua testificatus sit initio statim principatus , professus quadringenties milies opus esse , ut res p . stare posset . quod et ueri similius uidetur , quando et male partis optime usus est .	The only thing deservedly blameable in his character was his love of money. For not satisfied with reviving the imposts which had been repealed in the time of Galba he imposed new and onerous taxes, augmented the tribute of the provinces, and doubled that of some of them. He likewise openly engaged in a traffic, which is discreditable even to a private individual, buying great quantities of goods, for the purpose of retailing them again to advantage. Nay, he made no scruple of selling the great offices of the state to candidates, and pardons to persons under prosecution, whether they were innocent or guilty. It is believed, that he advanced all the most rapacious amongst the procurators to high offices, with the view of squeezing them after they had acquired great wealth. He was commonly said, "to have used them as sponges," because it was his practice, as we may say, to wet them when dry, and squeeze them when wet. It is said that he was naturally extremely covetous, and was upbraided with it by an old herdsman of his, who, upon the emperor's refusing to enfranchise him gratis, which on his advancement he humbly petitioned for, cried out, "That the fox changed his hair, but not his nature." On the other hand, some are of opinion, that he was urged to his rapacious proceedings by necessity, and the extreme poverty of the treasury and exchequer, of which he took public notice in the beginning of his reign; declaring that "no less than four hundred thousand millions of sesterces were wanting to carry on the government." This is the more likely to be true, because he applied to the best purposes what he procured by bad means.
17	in omne hominum genus liberalissimus expleuit censum senatorium , consulares inopes quingenis sestertiis annuis sustentauit , plurimas per totum orbem ciuitates terrae motu aut incendio afflictas restituit in melius , ingenia et artes uel maxime fouit .	His liberality, however, to all ranks of people, was excessive. He made up to several senators the estate required by law to qualify them for that dignity; relieving likewise such men of consular rank as were poor, with a yearly allowance of five hundred thousand sesterces; and rebuilt, in a better manner than before, several cities in different parts of the empire, which had been damaged by earthquakes or fires.
18	primus e fisco Latinis Graecisque rhetoribus annua centena constituit ; praestantis poetas , nec non et artifices , Coae Veneris , item Colossi refectorem insigni congiario magnaque mercede donauit ; mechanico quoque grandis columnas exigua impensa perducturum in Capitolium pollicenti praemium pro commento non mediocre optulit , operam remisit praefatus sineret se plebiculam pascere .	He was a great encourager of learning and the liberal arts. He first granted to the Latin and Greek professors of rhetoric the yearly stipend of a hundred thousand sesterces each out of the exchequer. He also bought the freedom of superior poets and artists, and gave a noble gratuity to the restorer of the Coan Venus, and to another artist who repaired the Colossus. Some one offering to convey some immense columns into the Capitol at a small expense by a mechanical contrivance, he rewarded him very handsomely for his invention, but would not accept his service, saying, "Suffer me to find maintenance for the poor people."
19	ludis , per quos scaena Marcelliani theatri restituta dedicabatur , uetera quoque acroamata reuocauerat . † Appellari tragoedo quadringenta , Terpno Diodoroque citharoedis ducena , nonnullis centena , quibus minimum , quadragena sestertia super plurimas coronas aureas dedit . sed et conuiuabatur assidue ac saepius recta et dapsile , ut macellarios adiuuaret . dabat sicut Saturnalibus uiris apophoreta , ita per Kal . Mart . feminis . et tamen ne sic quidem pristina cupiditatis infamia caruit . Alexandrini Cybiosacten eum uocare perseuerauerunt , cognomine unius e regibus suis turpissimarum sordium . sed et in funere Fauor archimimus personam eius ferens imitansque , ut est mos , facta ac dicta uiui , interrogatis palam procuratoribus , quanti funus et pompa constaret , ut audit sestertium centiens , exclamauit , centum sibi sestertia darent ac se uel in Tiberim proicerent .	In the games celebrated when the stage-scenery of the theatre of Marcellus was repaired, restred the old musical entertainments. He gave Apollinaris, the tragedian, four hundred thousand sesterces, and to Terpinus and Diodorus, the harpers, two hundred thousand; to some a hundred thousand; and the least he gave to any of the performers was forty thousand, besides many golden crowns. He entertained company constantly at his table, and often in great state and very sumptuously, in order to promote trafde. As in the Saturnalia he made presents to the men which they were to carry away with them, so did he to the women upon the calends of March; notwithstanding which, he could not wipe off the disrepute of his former stinginess. The Alexandrians called him constantly Cybiosactes; a name wich had been. to one of their kings who was sordidly avaricious. Nay, at his funeral, Favo, the principal mimic, personating him, and imitating, as actors do, both his manner of speaking and his gestures, asked aloud of the procurators, "how' much his funeral and the procession would cost?" And being answered "ten millions of sesterces," he cried out, "give him but a hundred thousand sesterces, and they might throw his body into the Tiber, if they would."
20	Statura fuit quadrata , compactis firmisque membris , uultu ueluti nitentis ; de quo quidam urbanorum non infacete , siquidem petenti , ut et in se aliquid diceret : ' dicam ,' inquit , ' cum uentrem exonerare desieris .' ualitudine prosperrima usus est , quamuis ad tuendam eam nihil amplius quam fauces ceteraque membra sibimet ad numerum in sphaeristerio defricaret inediamque unius diei per singulos menses interponeret .	He was broad-set, strong-limbed, and his features gave the idea of a man in the act of straining himself. In consequence, one of the city wits, upon the emperor's desiring him "to say something droll respecting himself," facetiously answered, "I will, when you have done relieving your bowels." He enjoyed a good state of health, though he used no other means to preserve it, than repeated friction, as much as he could bear, on his neck and other parts of his body, in the tennis-court attached to the baths, besides fasting one day in every month.
21	Ordinem uitae hunc fere tenuit . in principatu maturius semper ac de nocte uigilabat ; dein perlectis epistulis officiorumque omnium breuiariis , amicos admittebat , ac dum salutabatur , et calciabat ipse se et amiciebat ; postque decisa quaecumque obuenissent negotia gestationi et inde quieti uacabat , accubante aliqua pallacarum , quas in locum defunctae Caenidis plurimas constituerat ; a secreto in balineum tricliniumque transibat . nec ullo tempore facilior aut indulgentior traditur , eaque momenta domestici ad aliquid petendum magno opere captabant .	His method of life was commonly this. After he became emperor, he used to rise very early, often before day-break. Having read over his letters, and the briefs of all the departments of the government offices, he admitted his friends; and while they were paying him their compliments, he would put on his own shoes, and dress himself with his own hands. Then, after the dispatch of such business as was brought before him, he rode out, and afterwards retired to repose, lying on his couch with one of his mistresses, of whom he kept several after the death of Caenis. Coming out of his private apartments, he passed to the Bath," 'and then entered the supper-room. They say that he was never more good-humoured and indulgent than at that time: and therefore his attendants always seized that opportunity, when they had any favour to ask.
22	Et super cenam autem et semper alias comissimus multa ioco transigebat ; erat enim dicacitatis plurimae , etsi scurrilis et sordidae , ut ne praetextatis quidem uerbis abstineret . et tamen nonnulla eius facetissima extant , in quibus et haec . Mestrium Florum consularem , admonitus ab eo ' plaustra ' potius quam ' plostra ' dicenda , postero die ' Flaurum ' salutauit . expugnatus autem a quadam , quasi amore suo deperiret , cum perductae pro concubitu sestertia quadringenta donasset , admonente dispensatore , quem ad modum summam rationibus uellet inferri : ' Vespasiano ,' inquit , ' adamato .'	At supper, and, indeed, at other times, he was extremely free and jocose. For he had humour, but of a low kind, and he would sometimes use indecent language, such as is addressed to ygung girls about to be married. Yet there are some things related of him not void of ingenious pleasantry; amongst which are the following. Being once reminded by Mestrius Florus, that plaustra was a more proper expression than plostra, he the next day saluted him by the name of Flaurus. A certain lady pretending to be desperately enamoured of him, he was prevailed upon to admit her to his bed: and after he had gratified her desires, he gave her four hundred thousand sesterces. When his steward desired to know how he would have the sum entered in his accounts, he replied, "For Vespasian's being seduced."
23	utebatur et uersibus Graecis tempestiue satis , et de quodam procerae staturae improbiusque nato : μακρὰ βιβάς , κραδάων δολιχόσκιον ἔγχος , et de Cerylo liberto , qui diues admodum ob subterfugiendum quandoque ius fisci ingenuum se et Lachetem mutato nomine coeperat ferre : ὦ Λάχης , Λάχης , ἐπὰν ἀποθάνῃς , αὖθισ ἐξ ἀρχῆσ ἔσει σὺ Κηρύλος . maxime tamen dicacitatem adfectabat in deformibus lucris , ut inuidiam aliqua cauillatione dilueret transferretque ad sales . Quendam e caris ministris dispensationem cuidam quasi fratri petentem cum distulisset , ipsum candidatum ad se uocauit ; exactaque pecunia , quantam is cum suffragatore suo pepigerat , sine mora ordinauit ; interpellanti mox ministro : ' alium tibi ,' ait , ' quaere fratrem ; hic , quem tuum putas , meus est .' mulionem in itinere quodam suspicatus ad calciandas mulas desiluisse , ut adeunti litigatori spatium moramque praeberet , interrogauit quanti calciasset , et pactus est lucri partem . reprehendenti filio Tito , quod etiam urinae uectigal commentus esset , pecuniam ex prima pensione admouit ad nares , sciscitans num odore offenderetur ; et illo negante : ' atquin ,' inquit , ' e lotio est .' nuntiantis legatos decretam ei publice non mediocris summae statuam colosseam , iussit uel continuo ponere , cauam manum ostentans et paratam basim dicens . ac ne in metu quidem ac periculo mortis extremo abstinuit iocis . nam cum inter cetera prodigia Mausoleum derepente patuisset et stella crinita in caelo apparuisset , alterum ad Iuniam Caluinam e gente Augusti pertinere dicebat , alterum ad Parthorum regem qui capillatus esset ; prima quoque morbi accessione : ' uae ,' inquit , ' puto deus fio .'	He used Greek verses very wittily; speaking of a tall man: μακρὰ ζίζασ κραδάων δολλιχώσκιον ἔγχοσ And of Cerylus, a freedman, who being very rich had begun to pass himself off as free-born, to elude the exchequer at 'his decease, and assumed the name of Laches, he said: ὦ Λάχης, Λάχησ ἔπαν ἀποθάνης, αὐθίσ ἐξ ἀρχῆσ ἔση Κήρυλοσ Ah, Laches, Laches ! when thou art no more, Thou'lt Cerylus be called, just as before. He chiefly affected wit upon his own shameful means of raising money, in order to wipe off the odium by some joke, and turn it into ridicule. One of his ministers, who was much in his favour, requesting of him a stewardship for some person, under pretence of his being his brother, he deferred granting him his petition, and in the meantime sent for the candidate, and having squeezed out of him as much money as he had agreed to give to his friend at court, he appointed him immediately to the office. The minister soon after renewing his application, "You must," said he, "find another brother; for the one you adopted is in truth mine." Suspecting once, during a journey, that his mule-driver had alighted to shoe his mules, only in order to have an opportunity for allowing a person they met, who was engaged in a law-suit, to speak to him, he asked him, " how much he got for shoeing his mules?" and insisted on having a share of the profit. When his son Titus blamed him for even laying a tax upon urine, he applied to his nose a piece of the money he received in the first instalment, and asked him, " if it stunk?" And he replying no, "And yet," said he, it is derived from urine." Some deputies having come to acquaint him that a large statue, which would cost a vast sum, was ordered to be erected for him at the public expense, he told them to pay it down immediately, holding out the hollow of his hand, and saying, " there was a base ready for the statue." Not even when he was under the immediate apprehension and peril of death, could he forbear jesting. For when, among other prodigies, the mausoleum of the Caesars suddenly flew open, and a blazing star appeared in the heavens; one of the prodigies, he said, concerned Julia Calvina, who was of the family of Augustus, and the other, the king of the Parthians, who wore his hair long. And when his distemper first seized him, "I suppose." he said, "I shall soon be a god."
24	Consulatu suo nono temptatus in Campania motiunculis leuibus protinusque urbe repetita , Cutilias ac Reatina rura , ubi aestiuare quotannis solebat , petit . hic cum super urgentem ualitudinem creberrimo frigidae aquae usu etiam intestina uitiasset nec eo minus muneribus imperatoriis ex consuetudine fungeretur , ut etiam legationes audiret cubans , aluo repente usque ad defectionem soluta , imperatorem ait stantem mori oportere ; dumque consurgit ac nititur , inter manus subleuantium extinctus est VIIII . Kal . Iul . annum agens aetatis sexagensimum ac nonum superque mensem ac diem septimum .	In his ninth consulship, being seized, while in Campania, with a slight indisposition, and immediately returning to the city, he soon afterwards went thence to Cutiliae, and his estates in the country about Reate, where he used constantly to spend the summer. Here, though his disorder much increased, and he injured his bowels by too free use of the cold waters, he nevertheless attended to the dispatch of business, and even gave audience to ambassadors in bed. At last, being taken ill of a diarrhoea, to such a degree that he was ready to faint, he cried out, "An emperor ought to die standing upright." In endeavouring to rise, he died in the hands of those who were helping him up, upon the eighth of the calends of July [24th June], being sixty-nine years, one month, and seven days old.